Three of my friends from Austin started a website documenting Jesus' daily life. It's pretty hysterical and sure to piss off the religious extremists in your life. Here's the blurb: "Check it...Jesus is sick of all the bullshit. Christmas is not his birthday...he doesn’t hate fags...oh yeah, and he’s black. We of team jesus productions (tjpro) have been hired to document his daily life in an effort to show you…the people…what Jesus does."
Here's the link. Spread the love.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
What does Jesus do?
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
My Birthday Party ended in Assault
I don't have the energy to tell the whole story yet, but here is the review that I submitted to washingtonpost.com
Psychotic Bouncers/Terrible Time
Marvin is the worst establishment I have visited in DC. I should have known it would be bad when I encountered a huge wad of spit on the banister on the way up to the bar. The staff was beyond rude, and I was appalled at how snobby and sarcastic they were to me. However, that all pales in comparison to the fact that a bouncer punched my friend in the face after my friend asked him why he was cutting to the front of the ridiculous bathroom line. Then the bouncer threw my friend down the stairs. The bouncer was arrested, and now we are considering a civil suit against the place as well. Summary: intensely crowded, overpriced drinks, potential of getting assaulted by staff. Find another place to hang out.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Vaginas Unite
So...I tried out for a role in my school's production of the Vagina Monologues, and I got a rocking part. I will present the monologue, "The Angry Vagina." Except my version of it is more neurotic and confused. Get yourself to DC on Feb. 12, 13, or 14 if you can. Below the fold are the first two paragraphs of my monologue to get you excited. Also, I showed my monologue to my grandmother and she is very concerned and wants to know if I can be recast. My grandpa loves it.
My vagina's angry. It is. It's pissed off. My vagina's furious and it needs to talk. It needs to talk about all this shit. It needs to talk to you. I mean what's the deal — an army of people out there thinking up ways to torture my poor-ass, gentle loving vagina. Spending their days constructing psycho products, and nasty ideas to undermine my pussy. Vagina Motherfuckers.
All this shit they're constantly trying to shove up us, clean us up — stuff us up, make it go away. Well, my vagina's not going away. It's pissed off and it's staying right here. Like tampons — what the hell is that? A wad of dry fucking cotton stuffed up there. Why can't they find a way to subtly lubricate the tampon? As soon as my vagina sees it, it goes into shock. It says forget it. It closes up. You need to work with the vagina, introduce it to things, prepare the way. That's what foreplay's all about. You got to convince my vagina, seduce my vagina, engage my vagina's trust. You can't do that with a dry wad of fucking cotton.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
So I turned 25 today, and I understood irony
It's getting a speeding ticket on the day you become, demographically speaking, a lower-risk, safer driver. At least my insurance is dropping, so that'll cancel out the defensive driving costs. Net gain for Joey! Fortunately, I'm in a good enough mood that I'm still really enjoying the idea of it all.
Also, now that the blog is faster, I'm wiser, and I've dropped some freelance gigs, I'll try to start posting more often.
Peter van Agtmael Press Release - Issue #1
Here is the interview Pete did with a prominent photo blogger, which was also posted on PopPhoto.com.
He also started working with abcnews.com. Here is the first piece he did (an article and 2 slideshows!), and here is the slideshow that just got published.
Another blogger posted his bathroom graffiti pics, which I find really interesting.
And last but not least, here is his new website that he just got up.
FYI
If any of you have some late Xmas shopping for someone you don't like, I have found your solution.
I hope you all like me.
Also, they are very clear. They can not ensure that the product is completely mite free.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Creative employment
So, I'm currently unemployed. In reality, I'm just biding time until the exciting portions of my life begin: namely, June's trip to Eastern Europe and then getting out of Maryland and going to grad school.
Until, then, sadly, mathgimp continues to expect me to pay rent. A friend of mine knows someone who makes 6 figures as a Craigslist "prospector," so I figured "why not me?" As I build the "legitimate" portions of my self-unemployment (tutoring, editing, writing), I need short-term money. Here are my most recent creative employment ideas. The first was a bust, but I'm pretty proud of the last two.
1. Tried to get paid to take online surveys. I got overwhelmed by the 60 spam emails I got in the first hour and gave up. Kiss "nuraido@yahoo.com" goodbye forever.
2. Idea two
3. Idea three
I'm on a roll, people! Tell your friends, let me know any of your other crazy ideas, they'll be on Craigslist tonight!
What shall we name the movement?
There's been talk for some time of the Tex-odus from Austin to the great white north. That Guy's morning post, however, points to a term not so easily coined - how do we escape the Mary Land? Mar-exodus doesn't have a nice ring to it. If we're all finally getting the heck outta here, what can we call that? And where will we go?
We need a name for our budding diaspora. That's all I'm sayin.
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